Traffic Signs:

Life Lessons I Learned from Traffic Signs

Don Maker

Wed November 28th, 2012

Many people are constantly looking for "signs" in life. They want to know the way, they want to be guided by some divine inspiration, they want the road of life to be smooth. They're tired of bungling around in their careers, their relationships, and their general place in the cosmos, without a gigantic hand reaching down from the clouds and moving them to the right place at the right time - or even having a decent road map to steer by.

Well, there are signs all over the place. We see hundreds of them on the street and highways every day. The problem is, we generally ignore them.

In the first place, I'm talking about actual traffic signs, not something "inspired" by a god, or even a famous philosopher. In the second place, they are short, and so obvious as to be insignificant. Or are they? A great haiku can be fraught with meaning.

Therefore, perhaps it's only the interpretation that's missing. After all, traffic signs are definitely symbols, and symbology can be extremely difficult to understand even if you're Carl Sagen. So, not having Carl around to interpret things for us, I thought I would pass on a few of the simplistic lessons I gained, after many long minutes of contemplation, from studying a few of our most interesting traffic signs. These interpretations may not work for you, but at least it's some sort of directions to start with.

Stop

After you stop at this sign, what next? You look both ways, both for other traffic and people crossing the street. You decide when it's safe to proceed.

This is something we often fail to do in life. We move ahead like we're wearing blinders, charging toward a goal that may or not be where we really want to end up. We don't look for dangers.

Sometimes, we need to come to a complete halt in our life, look around, count to three thousand, and reassess the situation. Maybe we're going in the wrong direction but did not realize it. Maybe there's another vehicle headed straight for us, and we would not have seen it if we had not been forced to pause for just a moment. Perhaps there's a child rolling a ball right in our way, but we didn't notice, and that child might have been badly hurt because we were ignoring him or her.

Sometimes we hear very distinctly someone tell us to stop. Our spouse, a teacher, a boss or colleague, even a good friend. Maybe it's because we're having an argument and they want a timeout. Maybe they see us going (in their opinion) in the wrong direction, and think we should pause, look around, and evaluate before moving again. Maybe even it's our child just wanting some attention. Did we notice or heed the warning at all?

Sometimes there's a physical stop sign. We have a heart attack. We've been drinking and driving and we swerve off the road. We have several relationships end quickly, or we get fired from work. Do we just keep charging ahead blindly, doing the same things that prompted the stop sign?

On rare occasions, while we are driving we will be so oblivious as to miss seeing the stop sign. In life, we miss them quite often, either because we were oblivious or because we just decided to ignore them. As with being on the road, driving through a stop sign can get us seriously injured or even killed.

When things go wrong repeatedly in the same essential situation, there's a stop sign in front of you, possibly even a red light. It can be hazardous to your health-physically and emotionally-to ignore it. Learn to recognize the stop signs, and act as if you were at a red light, patiently waiting for it to turn green.

Yield

You don't have to stop, but you must slow down and consider the situation. Remember, a car moving in the through lane has right-of-way, so you don't want to be the cause of an accident. When it's safe, we can keep moving, but how long did we think about the situation to have really evaluated that it's safe?

We come to many yield signs in our life. They may involve our spouse, some other family member, a friend, a colleague or our boss. Is someone else in the right? If so, did we fail to yield, and thereby cause a terrible collision, one that was totally avoidable?

Sometimes, we see the yield sign, and it applies to cars coming in from the side. But maybe that car has not seen the yield sign and plows right on through. Even though we are in the right, is it worth it to be "dead right" just to insist on having your way?

In a car, it can be very irritating when someone violates your right-of-way. But, in life, it can actually be quite satisfying to yield, to let the other person have their way when the consequences do not involve life or death, especially if that other person is a loved one. In the case of a boss, it can be politically expedient!

Whether you know you are in the wrong or believe you are in the right, when you see a yield sign, be prepared to give way. Sometimes, it can make you much happier in the long run. Sometimes, it can save your life.

Slower Traffic Keep Right

This is one I often see disobeyed, on the road and in life. On the road, there are two reasons I ascribe to this, based on observed behavior. First, the driver looks straight ahead, never to the right or left or even in their rearview mirror. They are totally oblivious to traffic around or behind them. Second, the driver looks at the cars behind, or as they pass to the right, and gives a smug smile. This indicates they feel they are doing the "safe or legal speed", and believe themselves to be a regulator of proper traffic condition.

In life, this is generally the case with the old getting in the way of the young. Quite often, we are just too absorbed in our own direction, and unwilling to bother to look around to see if we are impeding somebody else's progress. We might think of this as just minding our own business, while those around us would consider it selfish. Frankly, life moves on. The pace of life has increased; the amount of knowledge young people have these days is amazing because of the information influx in the media and especially the Internet, and other technologies move virtually every aspect of daily life along just a tiny bit faster every generation. Are you one of the old folks who are resentful that you can't keep up anymore? You don't have to. Just move over to the slower lanes and let them whiz by.

Or are you a self-satisfied traffic regulator? Some older folks like to drive at exactly the speed limit or below on the motorway and never obey the signs that tell them to move to the right, and are deliberately trying to slow down everyone else around them. They feel they are morally superior to everyone else. Kids are in too much of a hurry these days, they have no respect for the older generation and society's conventions, and they are very rude about wanting to pass you by. Why can't things be like in "the old days"?

I've got news for them: things were exactly like that in their generation. Their parents complained about the same things. I know that, when I was a young man, I was very impatient with adults who "just wanted to get in my way" and not let me go at the speed I wanted. After all, if I ran into problems, that was my concern, wasn't it? As long as the hot-rodders don't cause an accident on the road that involves you, it's sort of the same deal.

Whether we like it or not, music gets louder and less coherent, art gets wilder, literature gets lighter and faster paced, and car engines become more powerful. One man's passion is the next generation's poison, and all that jazz - or rock, or heavy metal, or hip hop. It's the job of the police to regulate traffic, not yours. Do what you're supposed to do: Move over to the right if you don't want to keep up with the pace.

Divided Highway

The essence of this is, "You go your way, and I'll go my way." There is a lot of room in the world, and we can't - and shouldn't - try to force anyone else to travel in the same direction as we do. It doesn't matter if the road we are traveling is paved with politics, sexual preference, economics, or even religion, we should stick to our side of the road. It's much safer that way, because going the wrong way on a divided highway is just going to lead to a head-on collision. Lots of societies have tried to force a single flow of traffic, and many millions of deaths have been the results. Respect the freedom that a divided highway gives to everyone.

Two-Way Traffic

This means you were on a divided road, but both directions have now come together. It's a warning that collisions can occur more frequently.

I think most of us see this in life. When we are young, we don't usually realize how wide and easy the road is; we can afford to be locked into our own world without much regard for others - well, except possibly for the desires of parents. However, as we get older, we start encountering two-way traffic.

Getting a job is the first really big test of how well we can handle on-coming traffic. We have to deal with supervisors who not only have conflicting ideas, but they are driving the big Mack truck to our Yugo. Even co-workers have different thoughts and styles, and we must learn to accommodate them if we don't want to have constant collisions. Too many violent encounters and you may soon find yourself being towed away to the junk heap.

Marriage is a major two-way traffic sign. We can no longer tootle along blithely, with no thought to the wants and needs of others. There may be a lot of minor fender-benders along the way, but head-on collisions often prove fatal. From the divided road of our youth, we must learn to watch the other driver very carefully and react favorably to what they are doing.

Are they signaling a turn? Maybe we should adjust our speed a bit, and be prepared to react to sudden or unexpected moves. Are they wobbling in their lane, or is it us who is driving erratically? In either case, accommodations have to be made. We want to live in harmony with our partner, and give them the space they deserve even though we pass by closely. Whether it is a matter of finances, politics, a house, children, or just pets, don't crowd the center line.

Speed Bump

This is meant for the safety of others, but it's your vehicle you might damage if you speed over it. We encounter many speed bumps in life, and all we need to do to be safe is to slow down a bit. Don't turn a speed bump into Demolition Derby; it's just a little hiccup. Get over the speed bump and proceed on your way, don't let it put you in a bad mood for the rest of the trip. Life's too short to hang on to those minor irritations.

Intersection

An intersection can be a very complicated point in your life. You may very well be at an intersection, and should not proceed until you've really thought about it and decided on the best direction.

If you're not lost in the fog, a life intersection should be pretty easy to recognize. However, there are often many choices you could make, and discovering the best direction is not always so easy. You can't consult a GPS, but you can ask trusted friends their advice, or read articles or books by people you respect who have been there and done that. Whether you decide to go on the way you have been or to take another direction, at least you should be aware of the possible consequences. Whatever decision you finally make, try to make a go of it before you turn around and head in another direction. Trying to head down every street to see if it's the best for you can cost a lot of time and aggravation.

One Way Street

"My way or the highway." Everything in life must go in your direction or it will be tossed out. You know what happens when you blaze happily away down a one-way street? You miss a lot of life that may flow in other directions, and you run over anyone who stands in your path.

One-way streets can be extremely convenient, but they are also terribly limiting. Sometimes, you may find it really hard to get where you want to go because of those limited choices. Maybe you need to take a few chances once in a while and get on to two-way streets, just to give yourself more options to interact with other people, or to have more choices in your life.

Maximum Speed Limit

The opposite problem to slower traffic not keeping out of the way is people who want to travel too fast for their own good, let alone that of others. In almost all cases, a cop will give drivers a little leeway over the posted speed, but it's probably no more than five miles per hour. No matter how much of a hurry you are in, if you have a wreck because you were driving unsafely, only bad things can be the result. So, when you get really eager and are tempted to push the limits, think of the risks involved in driving dangerously fast. Not only will you reduce the possibility of accidents, but you might enjoy the view a lot more.

Slow in Construction Zone

What are you trying to build? A career, a relationship, a family? There are a lot of hazards in a construction zone, many of them difficult to see. And yet many people want to speed through the process, ignoring the dangers, already seeing their goal -- the finished product -- in their mind.

Don't drive into that ditch. Don't run over any construction workers. Don't speed through, attracting the attention of the cop lurking behind the billboard. Remember: Whatever is being built is meant to last a long time, and should be worth the slight costs in time and inconvenience to get it done right. Since you had to slow down, maybe take in a little more of the scenery. Who knows what pleasure that might bring?

Dead End

Yep, sometimes we hit 'em. But, just like on the road, there are usually signs that one is coming, and you may consider taking another route before you run into something you can't get past.

Perhaps the most clear sign of a dead end in life is unhappiness. If you are truly unhappy in your job, your relationship, or just a general "rut" in the road, you have probably hit a dead end.

Sadly, many people either refuse to acknowledge the problem, or are too lethargic - or perhaps too fearful - to try to change it. The old saying, "Better the devil you know," seems to ignore the fact that you recognize there is a demon in your life, but you are afraid to exorcise it because what replaces it might be worse.

Why are we so afraid to reach out for happiness, simply because we risk failure? We are already unhappy! The greatest achievers, whether athletes, scientists, artists, or whatever, experience many failures. It is their achievements, especially the sensational accomplishments, that keep them motivated to keep striving to achieve greatness in the face of adversity. We don't have to be great in order to seek happiness, we just have to possess the courage to change our path in life when we know it's necessary.

Detour

Fortunately, not all major obstacles in our path are a dead end. We naturally want to take the quickest, most direct route to our destination, but sometimes we have to find a way around.

You may actually be satisfied with your job or your relationship, but it seems to be going nowhere. A detour doesn't mean you have to abandon the destination, just take another route, try something different, to get there. There are many ways to get things moving again, and some of them may be a lot more pleasant than the route you've been going. Think of a detour as a way to explore other options, not necessarily as a pain in the trunk.

No U Turn

This is one of the most frustrating signs we can encounter. We know we're lost, we've made a terrible mistake, and we'd really love to go back and try a different path. But we're not allowed. We have to just plow ahead and hope we can find a way to our goal, even though we cannot go back and change things that resulted from an earlier bad decision. Especially in life, we just can't go back and chose that path not taken.

Don't make this into an ending; strive for a new beginning. In many cases, not being able to go back and change a mistake that leads to a terrible loss can be extremely painful. The ending of a great relationship can break your heart. Being fired from a job can be financially traumatic. A youthful transgression can lead to years of legal or physical troubles. But there is a certain truth to the saying: What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

While you can't go back, learn from your mistakes and continue carefully on your way. You might find the possibilities in front of you are even better than you thought.

Keep Right

This may sound a lot like "Slower Traffic Keep Right", but I prefer to think of it just the way it is. Whatever you are doing, just try to be right: make the right decisions, do the right thing, keep on the right side of the law and other people.

The best advice I ever got about driving is to imagine there's a police car right behind you. How many of us violate any of those traffic signs when we know we will pay the price immediately? In life, the traffic cop is called your conscience. If you are constantly aware of that traffic cop sitting on your shoulder and give him the respect he deserves, you will rarely violate any of the important rules of the road of life.

While all of the other signs may help in specific areas, this one encapsulates it all in two words. No matter the road we are on, whether we travel it alone or with others, no matter what the decision we are faced with, all we have to remember is to try to keep right, and life will be a lot better for us and everyone around us.